Oh the things my dog does

Simon is such a scaredy cat (er, dog). Since we've gotten him he has managed to freak out, barking excessively, growling uncontrollably, and cowering like a scared child getting beat up by the bully at least three times. What does he freak out about? Random, stupid stuff.

I have a kitchen floor mat with a chef on it. It was sitting up against the trash can so that the chef was "standing up." He freaked out. Thought the chef was real and was going to get him.

Another time (more than once), we has gone balistic about a tall lamp that sits in our living room. We taped him on our video camera because it was so funny to watch him.

This morning, he was sitting on my bed facing the night stand and suddenly starts growling and backing up on the bed. I couldn't figure out what he was freaking out about, so I walked over to the night stand. He had himself a full blown hissy fit when I picked up my piggy bank and sat it down next to him. He took off running into the living room! LOL! I went and got him and made him get close to it and touch it so that he would know it wouldn't hurt him. He hated it! Finally he started licking it. Guess it scared him again b/c after about 5 minutes, he tucked his tail and ran away barking. He barked at that stinking piggy bank (which is about 1/4 his size) for 20 minutes.

Cheap entertainment. :)

Voicemail/Answering Machine

A few notes to those planning to leave me a voicemail/message:

1) When I say "please leave me a detailed message," you should probably note that leaving a phone number for me to return your call as you've requested is a good idea...especially if I have never spoken with you before in my life.

2) Trying to win the Guiness Book of World Records for speaking the quickest when leaving your phone number is not my idea of a joke. If it takes me more than 3 tries to figure out your number, I will delete your message.

3) Leaving me a message while you are snacking on your bag of chips does nothing but make me want to hunt you down and steal your chips, so I can have some too. You should understand that I probably won't call you back...I'll be too busy finding some chips of my own.

4) Our answering machine: "Hi, this is Mike and Amy. We don't want our debt consolidated, we don't have 30 seconds to take your survey, we already give our money to charity, our carpets are already clean, we have already won 17 brand new convertibles, with no strings attached, and we don't want new siding. If you're still with us, leave a message." Take a hint, salesman!

5) I speak English only...need I say more?

Please take these things into consideration before leaving me a message. Thank you. :)

Poor buddy

Simon has had an upset tummy today. Every once in a while he will go to a corner and poot silently. He thinks we don't know. It. Stinks. Bad.

LOL!

My discovery

Just when I thought my troubles were over, I was driving out of our parking lot today at work, and guess what I saw...not one, not two, not three, but FOUR of them! They're baaaaaack...and they've multiplied!!! They were strutting around practically mocking me as they watched me drive by. I could almost hear them screeching "Na na na na boo boo!"

Creepies just remembering...

ARG! Help me!

Someone please tell me how to get rid of the spammer comments! I've gotten 6 in the last 30 minutes!!!

I've seen on some blogs where you have to type in the code to post the comment--how can I add that to my blog so that the spammers will leave me the heck alone?!

Thanks!

OUCH!

Putting aside all things girly for a moment, let's talk about my finger for a moment. I cut one of my finger nails into the quick earlier this week, and now it is infected. :( It is red and swollen and feels very warm. I put some medicine on it with a bandaid this morning and when I took the bandaid off at lunch I squished some puss out. Ha ha ha ha! Gross, I know.

It. Hurts. BAD.

Feel free to send gifts, money, and cards directly to my home address. Thank you.

Stinkin ole stink stink

I got so carried away trying to make Simon not sad about me leaving for work today that I went off and left my lunch sitting on the counter. :( Since half of it needs refrigeration, it will stink when I get home. What a bummer. Hope this isn't a sign of things to come today...

Creature of habit

Same "getting ready" routine.
Same drive to work.
Same parking spot at Wal-Mart.
Same toilet in a public restoom.
Same seat at church.
Same conversation to Simon as I put him in his cage.
Same TV shows in the evening.
Same food selections.
Same polite smile when riding in the elevator with strangers.
Same websurfing sites.
Same clothes in my closet.

Everything is routine. It sure gets boring. Surely I'm not the only one.

Halloween

Definitely going to look into getting something cool like this for Simon to wear on Halloween. And. He. Will. Like. It. :)

Today I...

Sat in one spot for 30 minutes on my way to work because there was a wreck on the two lane road I was driving on and no where to divert the traffic...Not. Fun.
Swerved over 3 lanes on the highway to miss a dog that decided to dart in front of all the cars.
Suddenly remembered all the times that my mother told me if it came down to saving my life or an animal's on the road, choose my own. Apologized to myself for choosing the latter.
Got sad when I saw yet another rain cloud creep in this morning.
Lost my footing outside and tripped off the curb. Everyone rushed over to ask if I was okay. I laughed out loud.
Wrote a check for $1.87 at Arby's.
Laughed out loud again in my car as I replayed the above mentioned curb scenario in my mind.
Thought seriously about prank calling the local paper to get back at them for not delivering our past 2 newspapers on time.
Thought better of it when I told myself they might have callerid.
Felt guilty for not sharing my fries from Arby's with my co-worker who LOVES fries.
Turned all my pens and pencils in my utensil holder so that all caps and erasers were on top. Got warm fuzzies inside just looking at them.

The old book of Guiness

What some people won't do for attention! Just to be noticed. This is kind of gross in a weird way.

The future and stuff...

I always see those banner ads for classmates.com, and fell into their advertising slam a couple of years ago. I was surprised to see how many of my other high school classmates had done the same. I always find it interesting who has been married/divorced and has children. Friends that I was once close to have settled down and started families.

I'm the nerdy one who is anxious to go to the 10 year reunion and catch up on everyone's life stories. To see how many of the class clowns have grown up and out of their immature ways or how the one at the head of the class has surprisingly fallen off the level-headed plane.

I can honestly say that my life has not completely played out the way I thought it would when I walked across the stage 6 years ago, but I am happy. I am happy with the decisions I've made, and can look at my life and smile. There's still time. Time to fulfill the dreams and goals that I wrote about on the "Where do I see myself in 10 years" essay my senior year--"To become a famous Christian singer." We'll get there Mike. God is opening doors for us. Maybe not famous, but full-time music ministry. We've received His word...now we wait on His timing.

Don't know how I segued into that from classmates.com....oh well, for what it's worth. :) Check into what your classmates are up to these days...

Today I...

Screwed up the time on my clock while sleeping to make it show an hour later than it really was (don't know HOW that happened!).
Woke up panicking when I saw said clock and thought I had overslept by 45 minutes.
Waved at a large dog who was staring at me in the car next to me at a signal light.
Drove fast through a really large puddle and accidentally splashed a man riding his bike on the side of the road.
Ran a red light in order to make it to work on time.
Prayed the cop sitting on the corner didn't notice my sudden impulse to have a lead foot.
While at the doctor's office, went up to the counter three times when they called my name only to find out they were calling the other "Amy's" who were also waiting. (Note to self: Pick a bizzare, uncommon name for your child in the future.)
Thought to myself "It sucks to be you" as I passed the construction workers outside working in the rain.
Apologized outloud in the car to the construction workers for being so selfish.
Thought seriously for about 10 seconds of giving said workers my umbrella, then thought better of it, as I realized they wouldn't be able to share it easily.
Pulled into the parking lot at work and saw a bunny hopping under a tree, which gave me warm fuzzies inside.

Now, it's time to get back to work.

The end is near?

Mike and I are doomed. Simon pushed his head between the end of the cage* and the wall last night after we had put him in there for bed. Once he realizes that if he can get his head out, then the rest of his body will fit out too, we are in big trouble. We will have no more options after he discovers how to release himself from behind the cage wall. Currently putting the trash can in front of the area he sticks his head through has kept him from fully squeezing his little body out. I am waiting for the day when we wake up in the morning to discover he has joined us in the bed.

*Cage: Hand crafted wall created to keep Simon in the kitchen. Wall made of thick, plastic, construction mesh, metal poles, cut up hangar, and screws. Yes, we fully admit to being rednecks who like to make stuff.

Fight becomes a battle

Three weeks ago I wrote about my poison ivy and bandaid collection. Here I am again with the same poison ivy hauntingly sitting in the same small patch on my arm. I have been without my bangle watch for some time now, and quite frankly, I miss it. I finally got the lye soap from Dad, and yes it has helped. Yesterday I was convinced the poison ivy was gone (no bumps, no itch), so I dug out my beloved bangle watch and put it on. Wore it the entire day. No problems.

Woke up this morning with the same blasted patch of poison ivy on my arm again! I'm really sad, because I'm pretty sure the poison ivy has transferred to my watch, which is what brought it back to haunt me. :( How do you get poison ivy off of your watch when you can't get it wet?! Sniff. Sniff. I love that watch. I hate this poison ivy.

A new look

Thanks to my wonderfully talented co-worker, who graciously offered to help me, I have a new layout! YAY!

I know zilch about html, so I am thankful and appreciative for her help!

Awww, how sweet

These were too cute! I couldn't resist posting them. I got them in an email this morning.

Back to the grind?

Alright, alright, I fully admit that I have been taking a hiatus from working out lately. I've been too busy...okay, I'm not a very good liar either--I just haven't felt like it. I have been demotivated. :( BUT, thanks to the motivation of my co-worker, yesterday marked the first day in like a month or more than I actually went down to the basement and worked out. I. Am. So. Sore. Today.

I feel like I can't move my arms, and my abs hurt every time I breathe. Oh well, least it shows I did some good yesterday. Let's just hope I can stay motivated...or rather, get my motivation back. This hiatus sucks.

Fast paced society

It's been raining here for like 4 days, and yesterday it cleared up just long enough to display a beautiful rainbow in Tulsa. I was driving home from seeing my brother-in-law at the hospital and stopped at a signal light that was red. I looked to my right and admired the beauty of such a thick rainbow--I haven't seen one that huge in a long time. I was completely engrossed in such a wonderful display, when I was rudely interrupted with a "BEEP! BEEP!"

Apparently the woman behind me wasn't as impressed with the rainbow as I was and was more interested in where she had to be. I moaned outloud that I was going and started griping in my mind about how impatient she was, etc, etc. Then as I merged onto the highway I thought to myself, "Pretty sure if I hadn't seen that rainbow and I was stuck behind someone who didn't immediately go at the first glimpse of green, I would have been laying on the horn too.

Ahh well, gotta keep up with this fast-paced society.

And he wonders why we don't let him run freely while we are gone?!

Of all the things Simon has gotten into and chewed on: Mike's CD, electrical tape, my favorite "Friends" DVD, newspaper, a thumbtack, my scrapbooking ribbon, Mike's guitar strap, artificial flowers from my bathroom vase, we can now add one more thing to the ongoing list: my birth control pack, which he did in fact, manage to pop out and swallow one of the pills. :( If I get pregnant, I'm blaming it on Simon. I. Will. Not. Be. Happy. :)

With or without power

So I had a busy day scheduled for Saturday: finish the laundry, clean the house, including vacuuming, watch an episode of "Dr. Quinn," etc. etc. You know, the usual weekend stuff. I got out of bed about 9:00, played with Simon for a bit, then started a load of laundry. Sat down at 9:45 to watch one episode of "DQ." Not even 5 minutes into the episode, the lights flicker once, flicker twice, flicker a third time, then nothing. Everything went dead. :( No loud boom. Just darkness. Well, we did have some light from outside.

I got up and called the electric company and they told me I was the first to report anything. YAY! Maybe that means it won't last very long.

One hour passed. Then two. Then two and a half. This wouldn't have been so bad, in say...oh September. But to have no A/C in the dead heat of August. Not. Good. After four hours without power, it was starting to get really hot inside. Simon was panting--there was no relief. I called the electric company again and the message said there was no estimated time of restoration. Sigh. So Simon and I did the next best thing: we went to Mom's. :)

Spent an hour at mom's, and by 3:00 I decided I needed to go home and get ready, as I still had some errands to run...Electricity or not.

Got home. Still. No. Electricity. :(

SIX HOURS and 85 degrees later, we finally got power. I do NOT want to do THAT again. Needless to say, I got nothing done that I wanted to.

Bills, bills, and more bills

I went to pay my electric bill at one of the hosting facilities here in Tulsa that will post your payments for you. Mike made out a check for half and I made out another check for the other half of the bill. Before I left, I called the facility and asked them what the surcharge was for them to process my bill. She said "$1." Whew, I had exactly one dollar in my wallet...that was it.

So I walked in and told her this was my first time to pay my bill this way, and asked her what I needed to give her. She laughed and said "Money." Hardy har har...no duh!

I handed her the payment slip and the two checks with my one-dollar bill. "Umm, yeah, it's going to be a dollar for each check to process." What the?! "Well, ma'am, I only have this one dollar bill. That's all the cash I have on me." Her snide remark, "Then, I can't post your payment. Neeexxt." (Reminded me of the Soup Nazi.)

It took me a few seconds to process just how rude this woman had been to me. I must have looked like an idiot still standing there at the counter with my face scowled thinking, "Did she REALLY just do that to me?!" So I politely waited until she finished with the customer she was helping and said, "I called to ask how much it was to process and you told me one buck. That's what I have. Can't you go ahead and process it?" Her: "Nope."

So I stood there in the way of everyone else, dug in my purse and called Mike (with all my papers strung out on her counter--hey, I can be rude too WOMAN). I asked him to transfer the money from his account into mine so I could just write this woman one check. He said he would, so I hung up (still in the way of everyone else), wrote this broad another check and gave it to her to process.

I mean, I couldn't even write her a check for the extra buck because she would have charged me a third dollar to process that check!! You see where this was going?! We could have gone in circles with all the checks!

Then, she had the audacity after all that to hand me my receipt, smile sweetly and say, "Thanks! Have a great day!"

Urgh. Mumble under my breath. Hmph.

Blast from the past

I loved these things! I never had one, but was always envious of the cool kids who did. :)

Simon

Finally got a few more pictures of Simon off the camera and onto my computer, so I thought I'd share one with you. He's soooooo sweet. :) I think I might be missing him already and it's only been 2 hours since I've seen him.

This is him perching on the bathtub. He loves to do this, though he doesn't like to take baths.

With or without, a woman just needs her makeup!

I was getting ready this morning, and when it came time to put on my makeup, I went to get my makeup bag out of my work bag (I take it to work with me so that I can freshen up after working out during lunch.) To my dismay, my makeup bag wasn't in my workbag....Panic. Freak out. What should I do?! It's 7:00 a.m. Need to leave in 30 minutes. So I called a co-worker whom I knew would already be at work have her check my office for the makeup bag. It wasn't there. More panic. Freak out again. Called my sister to ask her to save the day (she DOES work for Mary Kay after all). Went to check one more time in my work bag. Sigh of relief. It was there! That. Could. Have. Been. REALLY. Bad.

On a sad note

This depresses me. I never knew such a game exsisted. Did you?

Back

At ease Soldier. No, they didn't have pizza and not invite you because you stink. No, there wasn't any cool sightings outside. Yes, they were having a meeting without you. You. Just. Weren't. Invited.

Sniff, sniff. I feel so unloved.

Oh well, at least they are back, and while they were away, a co-worker came over and shared his popcorn with me. :) Things are starting to look up for National Lazy Day! :)

Where'd everybody go?!

This entire side of the building has suddenly become quiet and vacant. I went to each office hoping to find someone, but was unsuccessful. I think they threw a celebration party without me. Maybe they ordered pizza and didn't invite me because they think I stink. Maybe there's something exciting going on outside like a tornado or something that everyone has rushed out to see. Well, it is August, so that's not likely (although they did do the alarm test at noon today). Maybe everyone but me got a memo saying "Let's all go home in honor of National Lazy Day."

I think I'm going to go up and down the hall screaming, "Did you forget about me???? I work here too ya know! I don't work well when left alone!!"

My hands are clammy. I'm starting to sweat. I'm breathing heavily. I.AM.SO.SCARED!!!!!

August

Well, someone else shares the same opinion that I do of August. Check it out here. It's rather enlightening.

Sheer Laziness

In honor of National Lazy Day, I think I will call in to work, sleep in until noon, move to the couch and watch a little TV, munch on some chips while watching TV, move to the chair on the other side of the living room to get a new angle of the TV, get up and get a new bag of chips, move to the couch to take a nap, wake up and eat more chips, watch more TV, go to bed for the night.

Nah, I'm just too lazy to do all that.

Robbed

Ahh, the smell of the gentle breeze blowing in your face; the sound of the crisp yellow and orange leaves crunching underneath your feet; the thought of football season is right around the corner in your mind...Is it already autumn? NO! It's the experience I go through whenever I'm standing in my backyard...all the leaves have fallen from my trees and everything is dry and bare in my backyard because it's been so gosh-darn HOT around this mug! Grrr...I should still have another month to enjoy the beauty of summer. I'm not ready for fall! I'm not ready, I tell ya!

What a relationship!

Does this couple not even talk to one another when they travel?! Six hours of silence is a LONG time...

Weekend recap

Friday: Dentist appointment cancelled--Yippee! Partially clean house, do laundry, give Simon a bath. Get nails done. Come home and continue cleaning house. Find six credit card applications. Shred said applications, put shreddings in prepaid envelopes, and post on the mailbox. Play with Simon. Put bandaids on scrapes where Simon "playfully" bit a chunk out of my foot. Give Simon a treat for finally acting like a boy dog when he plays and not running under the bed like a sissy. Watch TV. Drive to Wagoner to have dinner with friends. Watch more TV before bed.

Saturday: Wake up at 7:30. Play with Simon. Continue cleaning house. Do load 8 of laundry. Get groceries. Play with Simon. Do loads 9 and 10 of laundry. Go to my 2 year old nephew's birthday party. Note: Two year olds do not want clothes as gifts, they do not have an attention span long enough to open 15-20 presents--once they open the cool toy, it's over, they do not want to eat cake and ice cream--they want to play with new presents, and they could care less who came to the party. Go home. Play with Simon. Go to Mom and Dad's. Play Skipbo. Catch Simon outside rolling in another dog's poop. Call Simon a "Stinky Pot." Go home. Give Simon another bath. Do load 11 of laundry. Go to the 10 o'clock showing of "Wedding Crashers" with sister. Go home and crash on bed.

Sunday: Wake up at 7:00 to Simon licking my face. Tell Simon to leave me alone and go back to bed. Wake up at 7:30 to Simon pouncing my face. Let Simon out to potty. Get back in bed. Wake up at 8:15 to Simon barking at the neighbor's dog. Put Simon in his cage. Wake up at 8:45 to start getting ready for church. Go to church. Make yummy tortilla soup. Nap. Go to church again. Make cinnamon chips for snack. Watch "Dr. Quinn." Put Simon to bed. Sigh at the realization that another weekend has come and gone.

"It's just 'things' Amy"....my Mom always says. Well, THINGS matter to me, Mom!!

I love my new dog. There's not much that he does that I don't think is absolutely adorable and makes me want to love and squeeze him all day...

However, I guess we never sat down with him and told him just how much my DVDs mean to me; how much money I have invested in my time-consuming hobby; how when I am in the shower and Mike is sleeping, it is NOT okay to crawl into the entertainment center and get one of my FAVORITE DVDs and munch the crap out of it. Oh, yes...got out of the shower and found him gnawing on one of my "Friends" DVDs. I. Was. NOT. Happy. Why couldn't he have grabbed the dumb Play Station games that Mike never plays with?! Note to self and Mike: Close glass on entertainment center when not in use.

Pretty sure he got in trouble and I stayed mad at him for like ten whole minutes. Think that him getting in trouble backfired because he wouldn't play with me for the rest of the day. It is true. My dog pouts.

Peter Jennings

This is the saddest news I've heard all year. I'm really going to miss him.

Poochie

Aww, the only time my dog wants me to hold him is when I'm eating something he wants. :( I feel so unloved...

Case#: 1050592

ROFLOL! What the heck kind of dog is this?! The site says it's Italian Greyhound, but quite frankly, I gotta say it looks more "Sid" from the movie Ice Age.



Oh well, in any case, he's up for adoption.

Gypped

I bought a package of cheese/peanut butter crackers from the snack box, and one of the sandwich crackers only had a cracker on one side. I've. Been. Gypped. :(

Late

Pretty sure I got completely ready this morning, got in my car to go to work and decided I didn't like the outfit I had on. So I went back in, while I left my car running, and changed clothes. :)

I'm such a girl. :)

50 Things That Make Me Happy

Since I did 50 things that bug me, figured I outta counteract it with 50 things that make me happy. :)

1. a new outfit
2. being complimented
3. singing
4. puppies
5. hearing "I love you"
6. being hugged
7. a clean house
8. winning
9. getting new office supplies
10. telling someone "Happy Birthday" who doesn't expect it
11. goldfish snack crackers
12. my pink purse
13. finding money
14. Christmas lights
15. brownies
16. getting flowers
17. the smell of cinnamon
18. hearing my favorite song on the radio
19. presents (giving and receiving)
20. running into an old friend
21. sending shredded credit card applications back to the companies in their pre-paid envelopes
22. scrapbooking
23. taking pictures
24. leaving a big tip
25. a big glass of pink lemonade
26. putting away the groceries
27. hitting all the green lights
28. getting an extra 10% off a purchase
29. coupons
30. sunshine
31. the smell of a new car
32. getting my nails done
33. going on vacation
34. receiving comments on my blog
35. reminiscing
36. when Simon goes potty outside
37. running in a field of grass
38. Saturdays
39. movies
40. decorating my house
41. watching "Friends" before bed with my hubby
42. writing on my calendar
43. being home
44. flip flops
45. surprises
46. a good picture of me on my license
47. seeing the ocean
48. having all the lights on in my room
49. fudge popsicles
50. seeing a Dad playing with his kids

What makes you happy?

50 Things That Bug Me

1. mosquitos
2. granny panties
3. missing the basket when I throw the ball
4. forgetting things
5. dropping food on my new outfit
6. losing my pen
7. junk mail
8. bad customer service
9. know-it-alls
10. holes in my socks
11. pop up ads
12. too tight jeans
13. overplayed songs on the radio
14. losing
15. hair in the drain
16. dishes in the sink
17. cigarette smoke
18. unpolite people
19. tattle-tales
20. rude drivers
21. kids with no manners
22. waiting in line
23. discovering ther is no toilet paper after going to the bathroom
24. a run in a brand new pair of pantyhose
25. rain on a good hair day
26. rain when you have to go outside with no umbrella
27. being late
28. doing laundry
29. morning breath
30. finding melted chapstick all over the clothes in the dryer
31. overflowing trash cans
32. someone clipping their nails during church
33. having no gum after eating
34. getting a guilt trip
35. canceling plans due to inclement weather
36. chapped lips
37. disorganization
38. people who never have anything positive to say
39. when guys compare girls to supermodels
40. the smell of farts
41. cold weather
42. when people don't answer ANY of their phones
43. traffic
44. tolls
45. when people forget my birthday
46. paying taxes
47. bullies
48. when my eye twitches
49. assumptions
50. when the store is out of the one thing I want

What bugs you?

We broke.

After two and a half weeks, Mike and I finally caved last night. I have him to thank, as he was the one who planted the seed in my mind on Monday night. Last night Simon got sleep in our bed with us. Although I was reluctant for many reasons, mostly being that I didn't want him to potty on the floor in the night or mess up my comforter (he likes to pounce and chew on our feet while they are under the covers). I told Simon he had one chance last night. Surprisingly, he never left the bed the entire night. He did curl up next to Mike's head a couple of times and I did wake up in the night with him laying on me, but he was sleeping, nonetheless. Sleeping is a good sign. :)

As we got up this morning to get ready for work, I thought to myself, "What on earth have we started?!"

Annoyed

There's nothing more annoying than enjoying a nice, big, fresh bowl of popcorn only to get the pieces stuck between every single tooth. :( And it's really embarrassing when someone walks by your office only to catch you with your finger stuck down your throat as you frustratingly pick at your teeth. Very. Annoying.

I need a toothpick.